hands to yourself!

Last night, I had our first of 3 corporate holiday parties. With a combination of no one yet knowing that I’m transferring to our UK office, already spending too much time with most of these fuckers, and food not served till about 8pm (3 hours after the drinking started), I got pretty effing drunk.  Not sloppy, drool on yourself, make a fool drunk; just happily, don’t-give-a-shit drunk. 

Fast forward to 11:30ish.  We got moved from our original spot to the front bar of the establishment, and had a good ol’ corporate tab going.  I had just gotten the number of this really cute girl who was sitting in the lounge talking with her tight-faced, producer female friend.  She was cute, knew I was moving to London, and still wanted to meet up again.  I was flying high.  I was feeling good.  When the girls left, I went over to the bar to hang out with some work colleagues who are fun and not annoying when drunk (which, surprisingly tends to happen disproportionately to work people).  Sure enough, over walks my work crush of 2+ years.  When I say work crush, I mean everyone knows about it (including her, I think), so not really a crush.  Her team had planned the get-together, and she was understandably annoyed after the manager told her that our company “couldn’t afford another hour at the main bar, you need to go to the back bar”.  Fine with everyone else (because corporate was still paying at the back bar), but upsetting to her.  When she said this, I put my arm on her upper back and friendly rubbed it saying “Don’t worry, everyone is still having a great time”. She responded with “Stop rubbing my back you creep.”

WHOA. 

1 - Never been called a creep.

2 - Was not rubbing her back in a creepy manner.  It was a friendly, drunken “ooooh don’t worry about it” rub.

I assumed I had misheard her and said “excuse me?”

Response - “I said stop rubbing my back, you’re being creepy”. 

Now, I’ve probably been what one could consider “creepy” before.  I think every guy who drinks and regularly hits on girls has probably been creepy before.  However, I have never, ever, been called a creep. 

I immediately walked away.

Crush over.  Corporate Holiday Party Fail.  See you soon, London.